Monday, September 16, 2013

Calming a Nervous Parent

When I told my parents that we were planning on doing this trip, my dad was immediately against the idea. He didn't outright say that I couldn't go (mainly because I'm a grown man and he know I wouldn't listen), but he did express his concerns and overall disapproval.

He called me yesterday night asking me to come over to their place to talk. When I asked him why, he refused to tell me, but instead insisted that I come over.

Fearing the worst, this morning I stopped by to have this conversation. He sat me down, and he explained to me that this trip was keeping him up at night, and that he's really concerned for our safety. Coming from a 50+ year old Brooklyn-born, tattooed man who at one (or more) point in my childhood exercised corporal punishment to set me straight, I had to give his concerns the respect they deserved.

His main worry was that we were going to be involved in the obstruction of the sex trafficking industry. To put it more plainly, we're going to be messing with the livelihood of some very bad dudes. Furthermore, he fears that the corruption he observed during his time in the Vietnam war hasn't changed much, and that these bad guys won't have any issue with bribing the necessary government officials to make us "go away" or to have them look the other way while we're kidnapped and killed.

He mentioned this concern in passing over the past few weeks, but I figured that he'd just get over it. During this unexpected heart-to-heart with my dad, I came to the realization that a parent really never "gets over" the idea that their child would willingly walk into a situation that has the inherent, but remote, danger of harm. I even told him that as much as I appreciate the concern, I won't really know how he's feeling until I have a child of my own.

He gave me some information on orgs that are fighting the sex trafficking industry, information that he's been collecting from a teacher in the school district where he works as a custodian. Apparently he's been sharing his concern with others.

I made an agreement with him that I will gladly accept and follow up on any information and contacts he provides if it helps put his mind just a bit more at ease while we're away.

This reminds me of something a former colleague once told me: "It's ok to give your parents at least one thing to worry about once you've grown up."

Key point: Sometimes parents will still be parents. Call them, make sure to let them know that you're still alive and safe from time to time. Otherwise, they'll freak out and worry themselves into illness, and you don't want to be the cause of that.


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